Your breath feels shallow and your destination is in clear sight, however in order to get to that lunch table, you must walk through the cloud of smoke to get there. In highschool, it was very intimidating to walk through the area designated "the smoking section" as this is where the rebels of the school hung out. You know, they wore leather jackets, smoked cigarettes, skipped classes and slept around.
The "mean girls" and the jock bullies seemed so powerful and cool back then, but isn't it ironic how they always turn into losers much later in life? Don't get me wrong, I ran with a group that was neither mean nor prissy however we had our own group of "haters" in the school that nicknamed us 90210 after the hit series. I smoked on a casual basis well into my later years in life. I would never judge. That's not my role.
Move forward into the new millenium. Can I ask a very blunt question? As a thin person, when I eat salad every day, why is it imperative that the large women comment on my healthy eating, yet I can never comment on their ability to inhale an entire pie in one sitting. That would just be politically incorrect. They can whisper and comment on my outfits, appearance or judgements but I can never make comment about their unsightly deodorant marks in their too tight clothing. You know the kind; two pounds of sugar in a one pound bag.
Don't you find that it's always the same people in every workplace who are the "rotten apples?" They are unhappy with their own lives, their own marriages and themselves and yet instead of directing their energy to change themselves, they focus it on the new, weak or insecure person of the company. I would think that as mothers of young children, one would change their behaviour accordingly to set a better example for their offspring who look to their mothers as role models. You know the saying, show me your friends and I'll show you yourself? The same goes for parents and children.
This kind of behaviour exists everywhere. There are miserable people all around us. You know what they say, it's better the devil you know versus the devil you don't and in my experience, there is always a ringleader in which their followers do not necessarily agree with their behaviour however considering the alternative, would not want to be the target. Sometimes, it's as simple as removing one trouble maker, to change the entire dynamic of a situation.
I'm not only speaking for myself but for the dozens of people who have contacted me affected by bullies and evil people. Like attracts like, and misery also loves company. It's time to take off the mask and be truthful and realize the joys in life.
We as women are born with intuition and simply know when a situation is not right. As women, we are faced with so many challenges from birth. A friend of mine said to me that as fellow women, we should build each other up, not tear each other down.
Stop spreading the toxins. It seeps in like a wet carpet and eventually really starts to reek.
Nobody likes the smell of a dirty dishrag.
Strive to be a gold apple, not a rotten one. Trust me, it benefits nobody.
One thing is for certain. Rotten apples exist in every environment, but they are always the losers in the end. Be very certain of this.