Va Fanculo

Sometimes, Italians say it best. Sometimes, there are no words needed.

Sometimes, there is a universal language.

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy lives to read what I have to say.

Much love,

Wendy

xo

What would you think if I sang out of tune?

Friends are family that you choose. Keep them close and cherish them. There are people out there who don't have any. Isn't that sad? I find it hard to believe there are people with not one friend. You know the saying: Show me your friends and I'll show you who you are. You should be around people who reflect who you are in your soul, beliefs and heart and if they are not people you would be proud to introduce, you should really stop and ponder.

Who you choose to surround yourself in the limited free time there is, really reflects who you are as a person. Choose wisely and treat them well.

I once had someone tell me that they had a handful of people they could go to, tell them they needed $10,000 and not be able to tell them the reason why and those people would help them if they could, with no questions asked. Michael and I have a wide social network of friends, acquaintances, neighbours, colleagues and family that we chum around with on a weekly and sometimes daily basis. We like to think of ourselves as kind, generous, giving and good people. Nobody is perfect but if you can put your head on your pillow every night and know that you are a good person, a good friend and have done the best you could that day to make someone's day better, well what more could you ask for?

I'm grateful for amazing friends and along the path, it's the ones that have soured that have somewhat caused me to become reserved in my friendships. Friendships are based on trust and when things are good, you divulge all sorts of personal information. In an argument however, those details can be thrown back in your face causing you to view the "friend" as an opponent.

Lately I have been talking to so many girlfriends who are going through issues with other girls or friends from their past. The way I see it, is if you've got your health, your spouse, your home, your children, your family, your income, you've got it pretty figured out. Let's face it, there are always moments when all those factors are not completely in sync and when one area starts to go well, another starts to fall apart. That's life. I deal with it. We all do.

But it's so much sweeter when you can get by with a little help from your friends. And as for those soured ones, look at it as a learning lesson, a little caution in the future and always, always always consider the source.

Love,

Wendy

Not your granny's laundry.

Insatiable

How is it even possible that too much of a good thing is not healthy? I remember a specific episode of the Smurfs growing up, where Smurfette had an insatiable appetite for sweets, and everything she touched turned into candy. At first, she was excited as any child or smurf would be to have an abundance of smurfberry candy, until she realized everything and everyone she touched turned into candy.

It's funny how the human brain works. It truly is important to have the ying and the yang to create a harmonious balance. For example, you cannot appreciate your weekends as much if you are not working, because every day is a weekend. If you are a millionaire and everything comes too easily, there is not as much enjoyment in the fruits of your labour. Seeing too much of someone can also be a bad thing. Familiarity breeds contempt, or so the saying goes.

Day by day, habits start to form. Those habits turn into a routine which makes it that much harder to break the routine when reversing your habit or addiction into moderation. Take dating for example. You know that feeling at the beginning, when you can't get enough of each other? That feeling is like a drug. I actually have done research on this. The chemicals that are released in your brain are similar to those euphoric feelings you experience while high on drugs.

The problem is, when moderation or a change or routine take place, it's that much harder to break the newly formed habit or feeling of being together all the time. Is it better to eat one chip and enjoy the taste of that one, even though you know you want to eat the whole bag but shouldn't or can't?

You hear the expression that it's better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all but does avoiding those euphoric highs actually save you anguish and pain in the long run or should you just live in the moment, and deal with the consequences afterwards? Have you ever spent a day or tried to anyways, not looking at your phone or emails?

Should you just not even buy the potato chips to begin with?

Is too much of anything a bad thing?

Let it be.

....because sometimes in life, you just have to let things be. Whatever that means to you.

Free Bird.

What does it take to be happy? I mean completely, unequivocally, wholly full of contentment, joy and happiness. Are we programmed, at least as women to always crave the highs and lows of life? Or is that just me? Why is it that the manic moments in life such as heartbreak or lust are the ones we so vividly remember?

Is it okay to desire more than just the everyday grind of laundry, dishes and sleep?

It seems to me, in recent conversations and research, that women initiate the ending of their marriages in 75% of the cases. Men are left confused and shell shocked as to what went wrong. After all, they've worked hard to provide for their family, stepped up to help with chores and really focused on the communication aspect of their relationship. From the outside looking in, women seem to have it all. What would cause them unhappiness when they have their health, a great career, a wonderful family and beautiful home?

Can we ever really have it all? It seems that the answer is this: nobody is ever happy with what they have. It's never enough. There is always a void of some sort. We always want what we don't have.

If you're like me, I'm multifaceted, extreme and sometimes just plain nuts. While I can appreciate the safety and joy of my life, there is always the dreamer in me that sends me on a journey far far away wondering "what if" my life was different? What happens if I have children and it doesn't fill that void everyone says it does? I know as a parent, you put your selfish single behaviour on a shelf for at least 30 years. Am I ready to finally take that trip to Italy with my husband when he is 70 years old?

As we change individually, are we growing alongside our partner or merging into our own lane of finding ourselves? If it's true that at our core, people can't change, why do we spend fifty years with someone trying to mold them into our ideal?

I used to be a judgemental person in using such definite words as "always" and "never" when looking at others and how they lived their lives. I've realized that those that are happiest in relationships, careers and self are the ones who live by their own standards and not the ones that are defined in the traditional institutions. What might work in someone else's household may not sound politically correct to the outside world. I used to frown on people who lived in separate homes or took "time off" during dating. After all, the manic part of me would want to see my significant other every day of the week. If he wanted time off, wouldn't that mean that I am not trying hard enough? Why would couples take separate vacations when they've spent all that time either dating or chasing each other to finally settle down and get married? After all, isn't that what the entire process of dating is all about? To get to the point where someone chooses you to be with for the rest of their lives?

Why does everything have to be so cut and dry? Where's the fun? You know, going out, having a good time and not thinking about the future. Enjoying the moment. Seizing the day. Carpe Diem and all that jazz. My husband asked me last night how I would like to be remembered. Wouldn't I rather be remembered as a wife, mother, and a person helping out in her community rather than someone fun, wild and sexy? Does it really have to be an AND/OR situation? Can't we be responsible and flighty, a good person and sexy, a great wife and lover all in one?

Sometimes in life, we have to take a risk, turn off our brains and live in the moment. Like the moments in this song, there are extreme slow and fast paced periods in this lifetime. Embrace them equally, close your eyes and feel the groove.

At least that's what a free bird like myself is saying.

Love this scene in the movie Elizabethtown.....keep playing on despite the fire and water.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL8oQzuX0No

Rumour has it...

After a pretty shitty weekend, I pull out my summer attire and crank up Adele to pull me out of my funk. Rumour has it that I am going to Punta Cana in 5 weeks to shoot an oceanside wedding alongside a fabulous seasoned photographer and an equally fabulous bride to be.

A week away working in the warm sun is exactly what I need.